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Struggling With the Grief of My Father Passing

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I’ve been absent on my blog for a bit, and it is with utter heartbreak that I tell you guys the reason… my father passed away last Monday, early in the morning.
My father passed away.
It’s been a week without him and as I type these words, I still feel as if I’m writing them about someone else.
A week without my dad.
How is that even possible?
I’m struggling with a grieving 4-year-old, confused 2-year-olds, and a husband who is just as heartbroken as I am; he and my dad had a truly special bond.
Sunday night, I placed an online order at Target. The order arrived at some point and I left the boxes sitting there all week because placing the order was the last thing I did when my dad was still alive. I went to bed as soon as I placed the order and woke up to the news that brought my life crashing down. Looking at the boxes after they arrived, I was actually mad at the boxes, mad that I could do something as trivial as place a Target order.
My dad was the BEST grandfather. He was the BEST dad. I mean, he actually was about the best human you could ever meet. He will be missed greatly by our entire family.
As I come to grips with this reality, I’m not sure how it will affect my blog. I know for sure that I will continue writing… I’m just not sure when and how that will happen. I know that writing is healing and therapeutic for me, so I assume that I’ll write about how his death has affected me and how my children and I are dealing with grief.
I am grateful beyond words to everyone who has rallied around my mom, sister, brother, and me. We have the best family that truly is there through thick and thin. I know we will get through this, and I know we will experience joy again.
Thank you for your understanding as I figure out my new reality and work my way through this awful grief <3
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